We spend the first twelve months of our children’s lives teaching them to walk and talk, and the next twenty-four years telling them to sit down and shut up!
I WAS SITTING IN THE WAITING ROOM FOR MY FIRST APPOINTMENT WITH A NEW DENTIST. I NOTICED HIS DDS DIPLOMA, WHICH BORE HIS FULL NAME. SUDDENLY, I REMEMBERED A TALL, HANDSOME, DARK-HAIRED BOY WITH THE SAME NAME HAD BEEN IN MY HIGH SCHOOL CLASS SOME 50+ YEARS AGO. COULD HE BE THE SAME GUY THAT I HAD A SECRET CRUSH ON, WAY BACK THEN? UPON SEEING HIM, HOWEVER, I QUICKLY DISCARDED ANY SUCH THOUGHT. THIS BALDING, GRAY-HAIRED MAN WITH THE DEEPLY LINED FACE WAS WAY TOO OLD TO HAVE BEEN MY CLASSMATE. AFTER HE EXAMINED MY TEETH, I ASKED HIM IF HE HAD ATTENDED MORGAN PARK HIGH SCHOOL. "YES. YES, I DID. I'M A MUSTANG," HE GLEAMED WITH PRIDE. "WHEN DID YOU GRADUATE?" I ASKED. HE ANSWERED, "IN 1963. WHY DO YOU ASK?" "YOU WERE IN MY CLASS!" I EXCLAIMED. HE LOOKED AT ME CLOSELY. THEN, THAT UGLY, OLD, BALD,WRINKLED, FAT **, GRAY-HAIRED, DECREPIT SON-OF-A-** ASKED ME,............"WHAT DID YOU TEACH?".........
For two solid hours, the lady sitting next to a man on an airplane had told him about her grandchildren.
She had even produced a plastic-foldout photo album of all nine of the children. She finally realized that she had dominated the entire conversation on her grandchildren.
“Oh, I’ve done all the talking, and I m so sorry. I know you certainly have something to say. Please, tell me… what do you think of my grandchildren?”
Educational Wisdom or Irritated Parents ? *** We spend the first twelve months of our children’s lives teaching them to walk and talk, and the next twenty-four years telling them to sit down and shut up! *** Link: https://www.free-funny-jokes.com/funny-parent-jokes.html
Hahaha spot on.

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In response to “Hahaha spot on. (hehe)(hehe)”
Here's another lol - Mark.

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Educational Wisdom or Irritated Parents ? *** We spend the first twelve months of our children’s lives teaching them to walk and talk, and the next twenty-four years telling them to sit down and shut up! *** Link: https://www.free-funny-jokes.com/funny-parent-jokes.html
That's the truth! LOL.

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In response to “That's the truth! LOL. (hehe) (hehe)”
Lol, Rooster - we hear that often enough ...




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Educational Wisdom or Irritated Parents ? *** We spend the first twelve months of our children’s lives teaching them to walk and talk, and the next twenty-four years telling them to sit down and shut up! *** Link: https://www.free-funny-jokes.com/funny-parent-jokes.html
We spend the first twelve months of our children’s lives teaching them to walk and talk, and the next twenty-four years telling them to sit down and shut up!
Link: https://www.free-funny-jokes.co...ent-jokes.html
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All about Grandchildren? *** For two solid hours, the lady sitting next to a man on an airplane had told him about her grandchildren. She had even produced a plastic-foldout photo album of all nine of the children. She finally realized that she had dominated the entire conversation on her grandchildren. “Oh, I’ve done all the talking, and I m so sorry. I know you certainly have something to say. Please, tell me… what do you think of my grandchildren?” *** Link: https://www.free-funny-jokes.com/funny-parent-jokes.html
My Aunt sent me this one today.
I WAS SITTING IN THE WAITING ROOM FOR MY FIRST APPOINTMENT WITH A NEW DENTIST. I NOTICED HIS DDS DIPLOMA, WHICH BORE HIS FULL NAME. SUDDENLY, I REMEMBERED A TALL, HANDSOME, DARK-HAIRED BOY WITH THE SAME NAME HAD BEEN IN MY HIGH SCHOOL CLASS SOME 50+ YEARS AGO. COULD HE BE THE SAME GUY THAT I HAD A SECRET CRUSH ON, WAY BACK THEN? UPON SEEING HIM, HOWEVER, I QUICKLY DISCARDED ANY SUCH THOUGHT. THIS BALDING, GRAY-HAIRED MAN WITH THE DEEPLY LINED FACE WAS WAY TOO OLD TO HAVE BEEN MY CLASSMATE. AFTER HE EXAMINED MY TEETH, I ASKED HIM IF HE HAD ATTENDED MORGAN PARK HIGH SCHOOL. "YES. YES, I DID. I'M A MUSTANG," HE GLEAMED WITH PRIDE. "WHEN DID YOU GRADUATE?" I ASKED. HE ANSWERED, "IN 1963. WHY DO YOU ASK?" "YOU WERE IN MY CLASS!" I EXCLAIMED. HE LOOKED AT ME CLOSELY. THEN, THAT UGLY, OLD, BALD,WRINKLED, FAT **, GRAY-HAIRED, DECREPIT SON-OF-A-** ASKED ME,............"WHAT DID YOU TEACH?".........
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In response to “My Aunt sent me this one today. I WAS...”
Lol - Jim, that looked much like a "**** for tat" reaction.




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All about Grandchildren? *** For two solid hours, the lady sitting next to a man on an airplane had told him about her grandchildren. She had even produced a plastic-foldout photo album of all nine of the children. She finally realized that she had dominated the entire conversation on her grandchildren. “Oh, I’ve done all the talking, and I m so sorry. I know you certainly have something to say. Please, tell me… what do you think of my grandchildren?” *** Link: https://www.free-funny-jokes.com/funny-parent-jokes.html
Cute!
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In response to “Cute!”
Lol, beachbum thank you.


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All about Grandchildren? *** For two solid hours, the lady sitting next to a man on an airplane had told him about her grandchildren. She had even produced a plastic-foldout photo album of all nine of the children. She finally realized that she had dominated the entire conversation on her grandchildren. “Oh, I’ve done all the talking, and I m so sorry. I know you certainly have something to say. Please, tell me… what do you think of my grandchildren?” *** Link: https://www.free-funny-jokes.com/funny-parent-jokes.html
He was probably asleep by then! LOL

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In response to “He was probably asleep by then! LOL (hehe) (hehe)”
Lol, Rooster, that that looks more than probable.


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All about Grandchildren? *** For two solid hours, the lady sitting next to a man on an airplane had told him about her grandchildren. She had even produced a plastic-foldout photo album of all nine of the children. She finally realized that she had dominated the entire conversation on her grandchildren. “Oh, I’ve done all the talking, and I m so sorry. I know you certainly have something to say. Please, tell me… what do you think of my grandchildren?” *** Link: https://www.free-funny-jokes.com/funny-parent-jokes.html
For two solid hours, the lady sitting next to a man on an airplane had told him about her grandchildren.
She had even produced a plastic-foldout photo album of all nine of the children. She finally realized that she had dominated the entire conversation on her grandchildren.
“Oh, I’ve done all the talking, and I m so sorry. I know you certainly have something to say. Please, tell me… what do you think of my grandchildren?”
Link: https://www.free-funny-jokes.co...ent-jokes.html
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The First Child ? *** A man speaks frantically into the phone, “My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart!” “Is this her first child?” the doctor queries. “No, you idiot!” the man shouts. “This is her *husband*!” *** Link: https://www.free-funny-jokes.com/funny-parent-jokes.html
Had me in stitches ....



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In response to “Had me in stitches ....(hehe)(hehe)(hehe)(maniac)”
Lol, JD, -


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The First Child ? *** A man speaks frantically into the phone, “My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart!” “Is this her first child?” the doctor queries. “No, you idiot!” the man shouts. “This is her *husband*!” *** Link: https://www.free-funny-jokes.com/funny-parent-jokes.html
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In response to “(hehe) https://media.giphy.com/media/UDWqc1Lki...”
Thank you, DandyDon.


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What’s your favorite quote?
I consider it a balance
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In response to “I consider it a balance”
Yes, the inner balance is very important.
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The First Child ? *** A man speaks frantically into the phone, “My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart!” “Is this her first child?” the doctor queries. “No, you idiot!” the man shouts. “This is her *husband*!” *** Link: https://www.free-funny-jokes.com/funny-parent-jokes.html
Hahahaha
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In response to “Hahahaha (hehe)”
Lol, Mark, that looks like a lot of fun.



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The First Child ? *** A man speaks frantically into the phone, “My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart!” “Is this her first child?” the doctor queries. “No, you idiot!” the man shouts. “This is her *husband*!” *** Link: https://www.free-funny-jokes.com/funny-parent-jokes.html
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In response to “(hehe) (hehe) (hehe)”
Lol, Rooster, I am just dropping by for an additional laugh.



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The First Child ? *** A man speaks frantically into the phone, “My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart!” “Is this her first child?” the doctor queries. “No, you idiot!” the man shouts. “This is her *husband*!” *** Link: https://www.free-funny-jokes.com/funny-parent-jokes.html
A man speaks frantically into the phone, “My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart!”
“Is this her first child?” the doctor queries. “No, you idiot!” the man shouts. “This is her *husband*!”
Link: https://www.free-funny-jokes.co...ent-jokes.html
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Little Kids with Bad Habits? *** There was this little kid who had a bad habit of sucking his thumb. His mother finally told him that if he didn’t stop sucking his thumb, he'd get fat. Two weeks later, his mother had her friends over for a game of bridge. The boy points to an obviously pregnant woman and says, “Ah, ha! I know what you’ve been doing!” *** Link: https://www.free-funny-jokes.com/funny-parent-jokes.html - Parent Joke 15
Lol, Mark - a great giggle.



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Little Kids with Bad Habits? *** There was this little kid who had a bad habit of sucking his thumb. His mother finally told him that if he didn’t stop sucking his thumb, he'd get fat. Two weeks later, his mother had her friends over for a game of bridge. The boy points to an obviously pregnant woman and says, “Ah, ha! I know what you’ve been doing!” *** Link: https://www.free-funny-jokes.com/funny-parent-jokes.html - Parent Joke 15
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In response to “(hehe) (hehe) (hehe)”
Lol, Rooster, thank you


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Little Kids with Bad Habits? *** There was this little kid who had a bad habit of sucking his thumb. His mother finally told him that if he didn’t stop sucking his thumb, he'd get fat. Two weeks later, his mother had her friends over for a game of bridge. The boy points to an obviously pregnant woman and says, “Ah, ha! I know what you’ve been doing!” *** Link: https://www.free-funny-jokes.com/funny-parent-jokes.html - Parent Joke 15
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In response to “(clap)(clap)(biggrin)(biggrin)”
Lol, thank you, Starz.



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Little Kids with Bad Habits? *** There was this little kid who had a bad habit of sucking his thumb. His mother finally told him that if he didn’t stop sucking his thumb, he'd get fat. Two weeks later, his mother had her friends over for a game of bridge. The boy points to an obviously pregnant woman and says, “Ah, ha! I know what you’ve been doing!” *** Link: https://www.free-funny-jokes.com/funny-parent-jokes.html - Parent Joke 15
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In response to “https://media.giphy.com/media/LrC1m7Ay3xsha/gip...”
Lol, thank you, Mark


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Little Kids with Bad Habits? *** There was this little kid who had a bad habit of sucking his thumb. His mother finally told him that if he didn’t stop sucking his thumb, he'd get fat. Two weeks later, his mother had her friends over for a game of bridge. The boy points to an obviously pregnant woman and says, “Ah, ha! I know what you’ve been doing!” *** Link: https://www.free-funny-jokes.com/funny-parent-jokes.html - Parent Joke 15
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In response to “(hehe) (hehe) (hehe)”
Lol, thank you, Rooster


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What’s your favorite quote?
Your right Marianne there are a lot of good quotes out there...another,
Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible"
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In response to “Your right Marianne there are a lot of good...”
Yes, it is useful to be positive, as much as objective.
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What Kind of Contacts ? *** A policeman stops a lady and asks for her license. He says "Lady, it says here that you should be wearing glasses." The woman answered "Well, I have contacts." The policeman replied "I don't care who you know! You're getting a ticket!" *** Link: http://www.adrivers.com/trucker-article.php?n=9
LOL !!! Very nice... thanks :D
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In response to “LOL !!! Very nice... thanks :D”
You're very welcome, PartyOfOne.

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What’s your favorite quote?
It is difficult to choose a favourite quote.


For today, I propose therefore:
Rare as is true love, true friendship is rarer.
Jean de La Fontaine
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A Math Problem ? *** Teacher: "Answer this math problem: if your father earns $500 a week and gives half to your mother. What will he have?" Student: "A heart attack." *** Link: http://www.laughfactory.com/jokes/relationship-jokes/2
No it wasn't.

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In response to “No it wasn't. (hehe)(biggrin)”
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What Kind of Contacts ? *** A policeman stops a lady and asks for her license. He says "Lady, it says here that you should be wearing glasses." The woman answered "Well, I have contacts." The policeman replied "I don't care who you know! You're getting a ticket!" *** Link: http://www.adrivers.com/trucker-article.php?n=9
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In response to “https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/...”
Thank you, Rooster.


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What Kind of Contacts ? *** A policeman stops a lady and asks for her license. He says "Lady, it says here that you should be wearing glasses." The woman answered "Well, I have contacts." The policeman replied "I don't care who you know! You're getting a ticket!" *** Link: http://www.adrivers.com/trucker-article.php?n=9
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In response to “http://data.amirite.net/user_images/5a96d2e45e4...”
Lol - a nice picture of unforgettable Shirley Temple.



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Mother ? *** A husband, who has six children, begins to call his wife “mother of six” rather than by her first name. The wife, amused at first, chuckles. A few years down the road, the wife has grown tired of this. "Mother of six," he would say, "what’s for dinner tonight? Get me a beer!" She gets very frustrated. Finally, while attending a party with her husband, he jokingly yells out, "Mother of six, I think it's time to go!" The wife immediately shouts back, "I'll be right with you, father of four!" *** Link: http://www.laughfactory.com/jokes/relationship-jokes/3
Lol, thank you, Rose_Bud.

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