About me.
This is the place where you learn about me.
Due to my narcissism and desire to elaborate on trivial things, my profile is rather long. For your convenience, it is neatly organized with customized subject titles. Just skim down while reading the titles in bold until you find a topic that might interest you. Or read all of it. Or don't. The choice is yours.

Material is subtly updated from time to time. The update could be a few paragraphs or simple punctuation.
[last subtle update: September 9, 2016]

Name: Austin. My mom got the idea for my name from soap opera credits.

DOB: June 2, 1989. That's about two decades and seven years old.

Location: Kentucky & where ever dispatch sends me in the lower 48 states.

Languages: Englisch.

Race: Prefer not to disclose.

Amirite Related:
I've been here for a while. Too long if you ask some users. I think of myself as Amirite's historian. I can tell you all about the Great Before Time and where the name 'Amirite' came from.

Occupation:
-I'm a truck driver for Schneider National. 6 months in to date and it has been a challenging yet satisfying job. I've discovered so many different new places the United States has to offer as well as discovered many new things about myself. My current plan is to continue this job until the new year, then look for a local position or a new job entirely.
-Lyft Driver. Fun experience. If you have an up-to-date car and want to make some extra cash in your city, sign up for Lyft!
[part time] I also operate the compactor roller and dump truck for the family asphalt paving business.

I have a Bachelors of Science in Entrepreneurship and would like to someday own and operate a small business.

I have a very strong work ethic and have been working since before I was 14 years old. Work gives me purpose in my life. Until I quit my previous job at Amazon, my mentality was that if I just hang around a job long enough, I'll eventually move up. I still think that is partially true but I became frustrated and impatient with the progress I was making with Amazon. That, along with some other personal events in my life that snapped me into self-reflection mode, I changed my mentality. Having only two jobs in my life, I finally realized that if I didn't go out and see what other jobs have to offer, how would I ever know if they were better or worse than what I was currently doing? And so I've made it a goal of mine to try a new job, do it for a minimum of 6 months, and then evaluate my satisfaction. We'll see what happens from here.

Political Views: Ron Paul forever.

I'd call myself a Libertarian because in the beginning my views corresponded with Libertarian theory. But then a bunch of idiots joined. Now I don't know what the hell libertarianism is nor do I care. I base my decisions on one simple fact: The world is not black and white. I don't choose a favorite political team and root for it. Choosing sides is not how we're going to solve our country's problems.

Religion: I was raised and confirmed Catholic but I don't consider myself to be Christian, Atheist, Agnostic, Agnostic-theist, Agnostic-athiest, or any other stupid label that people like to pull out of their asses. I don't like my philosophical beliefs being categorized.

I don't regularly attend church but when I do it's because church is a good place for me to zone out and think about things. It also makes my parents happy. I like making my parents happy. I still consider myself to be a Catholic because it is a part of my heritage. However, I do not believe in it.

I believe in a higher power but I don't believe in praying to it or worshiping it. I sometimes refer to it as 'God' to make things simple when having discussions. I put my faith into myself, everyone around me, nature, the Earth, the Sun, and the Universe. I don't know what will happen to my soul after I die but I sure hope it's good.

Music: I like a TON of music; so much that I'm not going to list it all. Music has enhanced my life more than any other form of entertainment.

Special Skills:
+I'm a master at backing up and parallel parking using only my mirrors.
++UPGRADE: I can parallel park a semi-truck and trailer.
+I can make homemade gravy. It is the greatest thing ever.
+Finding happiness in the saddest of songs.
+Finding happiness in my occupation(s).

Special Imperfections:
-I have anxiety issues. I worry too much about certain things and not enough about others.
-I daydream at the worst possible times.
-My motivation to do things is sometimes unpredictable.
-Sometimes I let my desire for revenge disturb my inner peace.

Likes:
+Anything that makes me laugh
+Anything that makes me think
+Listening to music
+Mechanical things
+DIY projects
+Driving
+Psychology
+Architecture
+Business/economics
+Puppies & kittens
+Boats, sailing, & boating
+Steam powered machinery

Dislikes:
[these are just pet peeves, not hates.]
-Apple products (especially iTunes)
-Sensationalism
-Cats (allergic)
-Hippies
-Cars with something broken that could easily be fixed if the person driving it wasn't so lazy
-Clutter
-Disorganization
-Being in large crowds
-People who mistake my dislike list for my hate list

Hates:
-People who tailgate while driving down the road

Amirite Related II:
*I use Amirite to exercise my debating skills. That being said, outside of the debate, I really don't give much of a shit about anything I'm arguing and neither should you. If I downvote your comment, suck it up. It's not a personal thing. Sometimes I simply disagree and have nothing more to say. If I don't respond to a debate we were having, I most likely got bored or just forgot about it.

Back when having POTD was actually worth something, I got five POTDs and they were my greatest accomplishments in life (other than driving a Volkswagen Golf).
*1st: http://amirite.net/545258
*2nd: http://amirite.net/536285
*3rd: http://amirite.net/412093
*4th: http://amirite.net/591508
*5th: http://amirite.net/705439
[After POTD value dropped:]
*6th: http://amirite.com/756749
*7th: http://amirite.com/773271
??? Could have more. I don't think we even get notified if we make POTD anymore.

Learn more about me:
If you'd like to read more of my ramblings, get to know me better, or ask me questions, take advantage of the following link(s)...

Tumblr (rarely updated):
http://anotherblognobodycaresabout.tumblr.com/

Follow me on Twitter: @stickcaveman

Story Behind Username:
I have a stick caveman tattoo on my right hip (sometimes shown in profile picture). Here's the FAQ:

Q: Is that really a tattoo?
A: Yes.

Q: What the hell is it?
A: It is in fact, a stick caveman.

Q: What is the meaning behind it?
A: Well, it all started with a comic I drew in high school. It was a battle between Caveman and Tarzan. Obviously caveman won because he’s not a rope swinging **** like Tarzan, who swung himself right into Caveman's spear. So Caveman was the one who had the honor of being tattooed on my body.

Q: Really?
A: Partially. It was something I wanted and so I got it. My over analyzing English professor answer is at the bottom.

Q: That’s a stupid reason to get a tattoo. Don’t you know that tattoos are permanent?
A: No shit? If you think it’s stupid, that’s great. Obviously I don’t think it’s stupid otherwise I wouldn’t have gotten it permanently drawn on my skin.

Q: Think of how it will look when you get old.
A: When I get old, I highly doubt my skin will be in such good condition that a faded tattoo will make it look worse.

Meaning continued…

It symbolizes the past.
The stick caveman symbolizes an individual standing alone, fighting for what he believes in; it symbolizes the work a person has to put forth to obtain the lifestyle they want. If a caveman didn't hunt, he and his family would starve.
It symbolizes the very basic form of survival.
It symbolizes the earliest forms of art which were drawn on caves.
You're welcome to form your own meaning.