Apocalypse

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I just performed the classic error of having a peek at the predictions for the next ten days.

28 C (82 F) for most of the next week. Great. My brain hasn't completely melted down yet. **** Finland.

+2   2  Reply

ZonkeyBalls 2 months ago

In response to “I just performed the classic error of having...

82? That's cool weather..

It's been 100 and over here, with the humidity.

+3   3  

DandyDon 2 months ago

In response to “82? That's cool weather.. It's been 100 and...

Well, you aren't a fat pig like I am.

Even the thought of 100 F makes my farts sweat.

+2   2  

ZonkeyBalls 2 months ago

In response to “Well, you aren't a fat pig like I am. Even...

It's disgusting weather, for sure.

Just go outside and you'll start sweating without doing anything.

+3   3  

DandyDon 2 months ago

Unless you are having a BBQ, it don't matter if it rains or shines...

+3   3  Reply

JD 2 months ago

In response to “Unless you are having a BBQ, it don't matter...

I quite like the Sun, unless it's dripping hot plasma with a breath of the living dead hitting my ****.

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ZonkeyBalls 2 months ago

In response to “I quite like the Sun, unless it's dripping...

Didn't know you had a ****

+1   1  

JD 2 months ago

In response to “Didn't know you had a ****

It's right below my third stomach, but not completely pointing towards the same direction.

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ZonkeyBalls 2 months ago

zonkey right the reports are so rarely right

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LorraineTwevlehundredRaineTwelvehundred 2 months ago

It's rare when they are correct....especially when predicting snow. They predict 3 inches, everyone runs out to get groceries, they close schools, and we get a 1/2 inch. It's nuts.

+4   3  Reply

StarzAbove 2 months ago

In response to “It's rare when they are correct....especially...

In 1982 the Atlanta weather bureau announced on Monday it's gonna snow. On Tuesday they announced it's gonna snow on Thursday. On Wednesday they announced it's gonna snow tomorrow at 3:00 o'clock. On Thursday at 3:00 o'clock it started snowing and everybody in the city went "OMYGOD IT'S TRUE! I'VE GOTTA GET HOME!" And they all hit the streets at the same time.

Now you gotta know that people in the south can't drive in snow. It's a cultural thing. They can't drive in normal weather either, but they don't talk about that. So you have two million people all hitting the streets at the same time, and the only thing they know is "The more scared you are, the harder you push that pedal on the right." There were people who couldn't even get traction to get out of a parking lot. There were people who got stuck in snow going downhill. There were hundreds of cars found on their sides in ditches beside the road. There were hundreds of batteries stolen from abandoned cars. And the traffic jam lasted until some time after midnight.

All because the weather prediction was perfect and nobody believed it.

+1   1  

that_guy 2 months ago

In response to “In 1982 the Atlanta weather bureau announced...

hahaha Forgive me for laughing; but you painted a hilarious picture of what happens. lol This comment was especially funny....your words: " They can't drive in normal weather either, but they don't talk about that." lol

In my area we know how to drive in snow, and the roads are cleared pretty fast, but there's always a few who think they can drive fast on ice and snow, thus more wrecks and delays. It can be a nightmare.

I've been stuck on the main interstate in my city many times due to heavy snow and people trying to pass one another. My drive home from work was about 45 minutes but due to heavy snow and stupid drivers, it took me three hours..... not fun.

+1   1  

StarzAbove 2 months ago

In response to “hahaha Forgive me for laughing; but you...

Atlantoids often can't get out of a parking space because they are afraid to turn the wheel when they can't see pavement all the way around the car.

Back up.
Go forward.
Back up.
Go forward.
Back up.
Go forward.
Back up.
Go forward.
For 20 minutes or so.

+2   2  

that_guy 2 months ago

In response to “Atlantoids often can't get out of a parking...

ahahahah You're cracking me up. lol That's so funny. lol

+1   2  

StarzAbove 2 months ago

I find that the weather prediction of the local meteorologist is usually correct ... when they are predicting somewhere else. LOL

+3   3  Reply

Walt_OReagun 2 months ago

The only place I ever lived where they got the weather right was in San Diego. That was amazing that it was 80F for a high and 68 for a low 75% of the time. They were really good. Ha!

+3   3  Reply

Will_Janitor 2 months ago

The circus is a thing of the past, so all the clowns are doing weather now.

https://www.google.com/search?t...q=yanet+garcia

Dewey Hopper (KPHO channel 5 Phoenix) built his career doing weather reports while using an umbrella for his pointer.

+2   2  Reply

that_guy 2 months ago

Weather report for the Sonoran Desert: wind expected in January, rain expected in July. Summer temps 100-120.

It is possible to drown in your own sweat because there is no wind to blow it away from you. You want to stand under a tree, but you have to keep moving or you can't breathe.

In winter you are in danger at night when the air temp drops below 80F (skin temperature). Body heat radiates into the north sky and is not reflected because humidity is so low, so you need shelter in such conditions. That is why hotels in Las Vegas close the swimming polls when air temp drops below 80F.

BTW you only get weather reports in USA, and that is because we have SO MUCH of it. You can go to Hawaii and you don't need to be told you're getting rained on. You can go to London and you don't need to be told you are getting rained on. They don't have weather reports in those places.

+2   2  Reply

that_guy 2 months ago

In response to “Weather report for the Sonoran Desert: wind...

I used to frequent Washington D.C. at some point of my life.

I always knew I was going to be pissed on, two weeks prior to the trip.

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ZonkeyBalls 2 months ago

I was just wondering... At this day and age, you guys should at least have the official predictability charts... We do.

Here's the prediction spread (median deviation) chart for the next ten days, for my home town:

http://en.ilmatieteenlaitos.fi/...?forecast=long

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ZonkeyBalls 2 months ago

Anonymous